


Both ways

by Anonymous



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Gender Dysphoria, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Transdori Week 2020, voice dysphoria
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:54:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26587690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Maya doesn't like her voice. Kaoru decides to do something about it.
Relationships: Seta Kaoru/Yamato Maya
Comments: 7
Kudos: 35
Collections: Anonymous Fics, Transdori Week 2020





	Both ways

**Author's Note:**

> This doesn't follow any of the given prompts for Transdori Week.
> 
> This fic is about voice dysphoria, something I struggle a lot with but don't see too much of. It doesn't go into any detail about it - it's just about how they respond to it. (Fluff, no angst)
> 
> I'm posting this anonymously because I'm really going through it right now and don't feel like I'm valid enough of a trans person to participate in this week. I'll probably take this off anon in the future.
> 
> Also, Yvet (@/kaomayas_), if you see this, I wrote this for you! You're such a sweetheart, it always makes my day. You deserve all the Kaomaya content and I hope this fic pleases you <3

“So I guess I just… Ugh,” Maya groaned in frustration, grabbing at her body as if in pain. “Aya-san sounds so pretty, and she doesn’t even have to try. Sure, she’s like me, but her voice isn’t. Hina-san’s voice is really pleasant too, even if they don’t get why I’m fussing over it so much. They like my voice, but I… I don’t. And then there’s Chisato-san with her lovely mature voice and Eve-san is just… Well, Eve-san!”

Huffing terribly, Maya continued on with her rant.

“But my voice is rough and nasally and just… Really weird in general, as hard as I try to make it not be,” she elaborated, looking to Kaoru for guidance like so many others before her. “I don’t know what to do. I hate hearing it, but with my line of work, that’s hardly something I can avoid…”

Kaoru pursed her lips in thought, searching for a solution. Although she hated to admit it, she put a pinch more consideration into rectifying Maya’s problems than she did with any other. If a pinch was equal to several tablespoons. But she couldn’t help it! Her girlfriend had saved her in so many times of doubt and frustration: she was only repaying the favour.

“Well… There’s nothing medical we can do to fix that, can we?”

Maya shook her head disappointedly.

“I see. That’s a shame,” Kaoru pitied. “Even so, I may be able to come to your aid. When feelings of my own, ones similar to yours, fight at me, there’s little I can do. However, there’s no use in letting them consume me.”

Wholehearted faith twinkled in Kaoru’s eyes as she took Maya’s hand; it was a hand Maya hated, yet Kaoru loved it with the strength of a thousand suns.

Maya had that same strength within her. Kaoru was certain of it.

They just had to awaken it.

“I regret to say that I have no permanent solution. No, the solution I have isn’t even practical,” Kaoru confessed. “But I still feel it might cheer you up. It works for me.”

She chuckled nervously, trying to regain her courage by slipping her chin into her newly cupped hand. “It’s… Rather embarrassing for me to offer to you, but there’s no-one else I could share this with in such full trust. Would you like to see it?”

“O-Of course!” Maya exclaimed with conviction, palms warming in excitement. “Thanks for trusting me, Kaoru.”

“There’s no need to thank me, for it is you who is so easy to trust,” Kaoru corrected her. Setting them both back on track, she patted the space beside her twice. “Here, come sit.”

Maya complied, leaning into Kaoru for what wasn’t the first time that night.

“Hey,” she began, called to attention by the distinct snap coming from Kaoru’s direction. “Is that your old DS? I could’ve sworn you lost that.”

“I did, years ago, but as if by fate, it returned to me. And now,” Kaoru paused, placing it into Maya’s hands, “fate has directed it to you.”

“Huh? Are we gonna play Mario Kart or something?” she guessed. “Didn’t you lose that too?”

“I have lost numerous things in my lifetime, and that is why we will not be playing Mario Kart,” Kaoru pronounced clearly, annoyed to admit the truth. “We’ll be playing a different game instead.”

Just as she had said, a different game rebooted right on cue. 

"Oh, Nintendo sound?" Maya checked. "What are you gonna do with that?"

"Ah… I think it's better if you just watch, my darling."

Maya nodded, sitting quietly and observing. Somehow even more nervous than she was a minute ago, Kaoru slid the pitch controls all the way up, to the highest setting they could reach.

Maya masked her reaction as Kaoru levered the device up to her own face with shaking hands, desperately trying to cling onto the last shards of dignity and confidence she had.

"N-Now…" Kaoru tried to announce, her voice trembling as if to imitate the state of her hands. She cleared her throat, fully knowing that she definitely wouldn't get out of this with her pride in tact. "A-As the great b-bard once sa—"

"Hah, pff— haha!" Maya erupted into laughter, cutting Kaoru off as her entire frame shook with unrestrained laughter. "I… I'm s-sorry, Kaoru!"

"It's alright, Maya," she assured her sulkily. "I understand."

"No, r-really! I don't get why I'm laughing!" she persisted, slipping her hand into Kaoru's in an attempt to rebuild her trust back up again. "It's just… I wasn't expecting this, that's all."

"Of course not. It is a rather… Unusual answer to your riddle, after all," Kaoru supposed, giving Maya's hand an affirming squeeze. "Really, your laughter is exactly what I was hoping for. This isn't going to fix your problem even temporarily, but I do hope to distract you from it, even for just a short while."

Maya smiled honestly, before planting that smile onto Kaoru's cheek. "Thanks, Babe. It means a lot."

Fiddling with her hands bashfully, Kaoru preferred to change the topic. "Now! Shall we get started?"

"Yeah, sure!" Maya supported. "But I, uh, don't really get what we're doing here. Are we using the voice changer for something?"

"That would be correct, yes," Kaoru clarified with a praising tone. "You should note that this doesn't sound at all realistic. It is literal child's play, after all. All this application can do is cheer you up and make you, er… Cringe over the final product."

"It's cool," Maya said. "I'm never going to sound like the other girls, anyway… This is better than nothing."

"You shouldn't settle for just better than nothing, Maya," Kaoru lectured her. "You deserve only the best. And while I realise that this won't quell your worries, I happen to love your voice. It's distinctive, cheerful, and more important than anything else I could say, it belongs to you. That's what makes it special. I love every little detail about you, Maya. From your hands to your hair. That includes your voice."

Maya's hip was greeted with a kind and loving squeeze.

"Of course, my love for this aspect of you won't change your hatred for it. I'm very sorry for that. But please…" Kaoru met Maya's flustered gaze with a gentle smile, so warm it was rejuvenating. "Don't believe that your voice is anything less than pleasant. That's one thing it could never be."

The clock's digits flickered beside them, marking their arrival into a new minute of their time.

At last, Maya spoke.

"Thank you, Kaoru," she professed genuinely, every bit of gratitude she could muster showing in those few syllables. "For everything, and for supporting me through all that we've been through. I… Yeah, I really don't know where I'd be today without you. Honest."

"The sentiment is shared, Maya," Kaoru empathised. "I couldn't imagine my life without you in it either. At the very least…"

She lowered her voice to a playful whisper, leaning in close to Maya's ear.

"I wouldn't be Kaoru Seta."


End file.
